The Trials and Tribulations of Being Someone You’re Not.

When we are shown an opportunity to interact with someone new, we make the decision to be ourselves or to re-invent ourselves.


What I’m getting at is, being honest with yourself doesn’t always equal the most tempting choice or offer a quick fix on the hitesay ersonalitypay feeling. In the long run, being yourself is bloody brilliant because you’re probs not suffering from shite personality syndrome after all .

It is so easy to choose to “reinvent” ourselves when presented with someone new and interesting. Someone who intrigues us and broadens our minds (alright Professor Trelawny, calm down). It’s so tempting to make ourselves seem just as intriguing and alluring as Captain Mysterious by adapting ourselves to fit in with their ideals and values. Just change everything about us so they think we’re incredibly cool and relatable and the kind of person they want to spend their time with. Re-inventing ourselves sounds like the perfect problem solver; ditch the frumpy, rubbish version of us or the traits we hate and impress someone new. You never know, you could create a whole new version of you that you always wanted to try out, switch from Pop Princess to Queen of Darkness or something.

However, good things always have a catch somewhere down the line. By “reinventing ourselves”, or changing ourselves to try and fit in with someone else, we become someone we are not. A person we may not be capable of entirely or convincingly encompassing. You could have all the best intentions in the world to strive to be better and more likeable to those on the other end of the relationship, but attempting to change your entire self; likes, dislikes, interests, what makes you happy, what makes you sad, pet hates, absolute favourites, conversation starters, beloved topics. I mean… that doesn’t sound all that fun, trying to keep up with that in the long term. It’s all fun and games until you have to throw out all those Katy Perry albums and relegate your Harry Potter t-shirts to the back of the wardrobe in favour of drainpipe jeans and screamo tracks.

Is anything or anyone worth changing what makes you you? Improving yourself and evolving over time is all fine and dandy, it’s healthy and normal, but trying to go cold turkey and change overnight, for the happiness of someone else no less, meh. Mate, it’s not worth it.

Don’t change for anyone. Don’t give up happiness for anyone. Let them accept part of you, but don’t change yourself so they accept you as a whole. If they can only accept part of you, you only give part of yourself. Don’t waste your time trying to give everything to someone who doesn’t want it. Don’t forget to live because you’re trying to get someone else to.



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